So on Saturday I finally undertook what may be described as a fairly accurate test run for the tour. I was still lacking a couple of things such as bike spares and maps, but with a bike weight of 44kg it was pretty much all there. I don't expect to go over 50kg, and what's 6kg, eh! The plan was to cycle with my mate Ben, who had the loan of my suitably old and crappy Peugeot racer, leaving early doors and then meeting the birds at the campsite early afternoon. We'd booked the campsite and plotted the route on Strava so ready to rock and roll. We were supposed to get away at 5:45am, but I think we left at around 6:15am rather. This didn't surprise me as I'd already experienced Ben's propensity to faff extensively in the mornings. Not an issue really, and it meant it was a bit lighter by the time we set off. Ben was clearly still not fully awake when assembling the bike as, after about 3km, we had to stop for him to realign the wheel. I gave him some stick for this, naturally, and informed him I wanted no more 'mechanicals' masquerading as break time. It was nice seeing the sun rise, and it was a lovely day already. I was testing out my expedition clothing and it wasn't long before the merino jumper went back in the pannier. The first 20km were pretty tough to be honest, and a strava cock up didn't help matters - routing us into dead-ends repeatedly. There were a lot of steep climbs and passing what may be described as the uglier side of Joburg. Things got a bit more interesting when we got to Tembisa - a big township on our way out of Joburg. There was a lot going on, with the taxi mini vans driving in their customary godawful fashion, accompanied by a cacophony of hooting. Why they insist on beeping all the time is beyond me; it's not like people stand by the road, not sure what to do, and then upon hearing a taxi horn, suddenly realise that they want a lift somewhere! We also cycled through a fair bit of sewage-y smelling water and around plenty of broken glass, but overall it was a pleasant experience. Highlights being having, 'You're strong' and 'Eish' (in an inspired tone) shouted at us. It meant a lot more to me as they weren't mincing about on Pinarellos. We also passed a herd of goats penned up on the side of the road next to a petrol station, which amused me rather a lot. My shout of 'You've got to be kidding!' seemed to pass Ben by without hitting the mark. I blame his city upbringing. It was either an impromptu market, or they were about to have a big old party and eat them all. I would like to have shared some photos with you, but I was still in progress mode, and waving an iphone about in a township is ill-advised, especially when your means of escape is a massive, unwieldy bicycle. We stopped for a brief spell at about 36km, but it didn't feel like we'd accomplished enough to hang around for long. General consensus was that what we'd done so far was pretty tough going, and at under 1/3 of the way, things were looking slightly ominous. So we pushed on and luckily things got easier. It wasn't long until we were pulling over for a half-way break. Here we ate a combination of cold pizza and chicken sandwiches. We were also visited by a nice lady offering us ice cold water for our bottles as she had seen us on the road and was out supporting her husband and her mates who were doing 100km. I wondered what kind of shape they were in to warrant a support car for that kind of distance, but she was very nice, and was a very pleasant treat. From this point the road was nice and smooth with a decent shoulder to keep out of the way on. There were a few trucks, but nothing like the 511 to Marakele I went on a few weeks back. I cheated a bit and hid behind Ben most of the time, which although aware of the fact that this wasn't an accurate representation of solo riding, I thought why not cheat whilst I can. It also meant I could go a bit faster and hold him up less. Very quiet on the roadkill front - passed one obliterated scrub hare, but it was so mushed up and un-carcass-like that wasn't worth photographing. However, when we got to about 94km and saw some ostriches by the side of the road, I decided it was time for a pic. I know people don't like to read very much these days - even such intelligent, erudite folk as yourselves, indulging in high-brow blog material such as this - so I was to be able to get a picture to break things up a little. They were a somewhat churlish bunch, spurning the camera and abandoning the fenceline as I was trying to get a shot. We stopped for some more snacks next door, in a pleasant church carpark. Here we discussed the good progress made since 36km marker, and the difficulty of naming different tree species. We got to Bronkhurstpruit shortly after that brief sojourn, and that is where the dirt track began. It started off as nice hard-packed dirt which, whilst a bit bumpier, wasn't really much different to tar. Here Tina came into her own a bit more, with the 35c tyres coping with the terrain better than Ben's Peugeot. We both commented that it looked a lot like Australia, despite neither of us being particularly qualified to comment, never having visited. There was a bit of eucalyptus about so had that feel to it. There were also lots of lovely flowers out - cosmos, of S American origin according to Ben the Botanist. They smelt pretty nice too, actually. I like to consider myself an equal opportunities blogger, so please see picture of said flowers below. We weren't on the dirt for that long when things began to unravel a little bit. Parts of the track were rather sandy so routing became a bit more interesting. I think we must have looked pretty drunk to the casual observer, wiggling all over the road and cursing and yelping indiscriminately (for my part at least). It's a rather unpleasant experience cycling on sand - you're just heading along nicely and then it's like someone has just grabbed your tyre and started yanking it about furiously. You've got to just try and ride it out, as overcorrecting would throw you off. In true touring style I had long since binned off the helmet, so the speed wobbles had an extra edge to them. I had wider tyres than Ben, but given Tina's weight we were more prone to sinking. The sand ruined our until-then respectable looking average speed, but it was good to test out some varied terrain and see how we fared. We made good time, and totalled 126km with about the last 26km on dirt, taking about 6 hours and averaging just under 22kph. We then arrived at camp to be greeted by suitably impressed gate officials and receptionists. We'd beaten the girls so had a chance to admire the taxidermy without being admonished by Chloe. The baby Rhino was rather sad looking, but it was the snakes and pickled warthog foetus in jars that really won the prize for most grotesque. I was saddened to be informed that none of it was for sale. Once the ladies arrived we picked a spot and set up camp. Then I decided to deploy some of my toys. Tent and sleeping mat were put up, as was the washing line. And I made cups of tea for the others on my MSR multifuel stove. Very exciting! The park manager also had a cute puppy called Jock who took a liking to Deerdre (sic) the Duiker. We then proceeded to drink a lot of booze and slapped a big old fillet steak on the braai. A very pleasant evening, albeit one not entirely representative of my tour. It would have been a bit of a tough sell to the ladies to drive out for a night of camping, with no alcohol, and pasta or rice for dinner though! I felt I'd remained true enough to the fundamentals of the tour for it to be deemed an accurate field test. We then went walking the next morning followed by cooking a full english on the wonder machine that is the Cobb. Things I Learnt from the Test Ride...- Tar beats sand, and to a lesser extent dirt, as a cycling surface. Expect closer scrutiny of routes and surfaces when I start touring properly.
- The stove is good, but bloody noisy. It also covers you in petrol no matter what you do. - Spare bolts for pannier racks are essential as one shook out on the dirt road on the way to camp - The stool is a pain to stow - thinking replacement with foam padding instead. - We had some rain so waterproof essential. I think I will take a poncho as better cover than a normal jacket. - It gets chilly - very glad I have now taken delivery of my luxurious (but lightweight) down jacket. - Most people on the road are nice, and love a bit of a 'ding' on the bell. - I need to find a comfier saddle, pronto - or wear a padded nappy some days. - The wing mirror needs moving in order to give me another handlebar-holding option.
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AuthorSam Brook - A mildly Africanised Pom about to cycle from Joburg to Nairobi. Archives
August 2017
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